How to Properly Eat Oreos

Story by Lydia Church

Everyone eats food differently. Some of us eat the conventional way, then there are those of us with questionable methods for eating various foods that the rest of us judge…but never discuss. What if you were asked how you eat a certain food? Would you believe this is how everyone should eat it? Today, one of the hottest debates in food consumption will be put to rest: What is the proper way to eat Oreos?

When given the question–“How do you eat your Oreos”–there were many like-minded people with similar responses. Most people responded: “with milk.” Yet many were not very detailed in their responses other than Senior Nick Goss who replied, “I drown it in milk with a fork until all of the bubbles in the milk are done.”

Along with the milk, there were a lot of “like a normal cookie” responses. Nothing special, just like a cookie. “I eat them the way they come because I’m not a psychopath,” says Abby Napper, also a senior. 

Although there were many repeat responses, there were also a few unique responses too. Kirati Kiviniemi on Instagram says, “I enjoy scraping off the middle and only eating the cookies if I’m not feeling lazy.” Taking a sixth grade dissection project approach in this case, his form closely relates to the also common separation technique in which you separate the cookie down the middle, creating one cookie that is plain and one with all the cream. 

The most intense debate was deciding whether the cookies should be eaten as a whole or separated into halves. Separate being eating one side before the other. 65%of those who answered said whole, while the other 35% replied separately. For those who chose to eat separately, another question was posed. Should you eat the cream side first or the cookieside? 52% said they would go for the cookie side first, the other 48% said they would chow down on the cream. And for the final question there was a decisive winner. When asked whether to eat Oreos with or without milk, 82%sided with milk, while 18% thought the glass of milk should be left out of the equation. 

After interviewing the students at Jeff High, including in decisive students, the proper way to eat an Oreo was finally determined: You should eat an Oreo as a whole cookie with a cool glass of milk. Though on days when you feel that you should take that risk of separation, eating the plain cookie side before the cream cookie side is recommended in order to save the best for last. This is unless you are Evan Cawthorn, a senior, who had strong opinions when asked about eating Oreos saying, “I don’t. I hate them”

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